Boys In My Life

Hi B !

Another blogpost. I don’t know why I have a lot of things I want to share in my blog. I was spent my holiday with all my girls. Suddenly I think about something about my “lonely” moment.

I used to lean on boys almost in the whole of my  life. When I was young I spent my life with my father. He is the best one, after school I went to his office and he hugged me no matter he was still at the important meeting.  He gave me every single thing I wanted no matter how small I am to have those thing. He always be there everytime, everywhere, until I was 10 years old, the time he passed out. It was like doomed day for me. I lost the only important thing in my life. He was the only man who can make me feel so special.

Therefore, I used to play with all my cousins. They are all boys. I just have one nephew and she lived so far away from me. So i used to play boy’s game,  like a boy, dress up like a boy. I love all my cousin until now. They always there everytime I want to talk about something. I hang up with them, watch soccer with them and also talked with their girlfriend’s.

Because of that I have a lot of boy-friends (not special "boyfriend") in Junior High. I just feel so comfortable being around them than being with girls. Boys are so much rational than girls. Being with all the boys make me feel so respected. They always took care of me. I remember when i was in fight with one of the boy in my marching band team. Suddenly I heard that one of the most naughty boy’s in the school punched him on the face because of they want to protect me. I never asked them to help me but they said that they will do everything if that boy treat me so bad again. This is amazing and i always feel so amazing with all my boy-friends.

In senior high i mingle with one of my best friend. I called him best friend because i adore him since the very first time in Junior high. I adore him like crazy. He is the best because when everybody hate me, talk bad things behind my back, he always there. He made me smile, he asked me to hang out with him, he never asked about all the bad thing that happened to me in school. He was rarely talk to girls and i was the one. He became my boyfriend at that time. But it just didn't work out for both of us. I love him like crazy until i realized that he is just my best friend forever, he is my brother, my family member. So it's totally normal to always happy when he is around me. He is magic. He can always make me smile no matter what but he never realize. I adore you my brother, my ex-boyfriend and my forever best friend :)


In the USA. Yap! again i have a lot of boy-friend. I mean i don't know why boy-friend is soooo much fun! In my school there are just 6 girls of exchange student. The other mostly boys. The special one was Camilo from Chile. He went to the same school as me and sometimes be in the same class with me. He always with me no matter what i do, when i was angry, cry, laugh, smile he always there. The other also cool. They are funny especially Victor from Brazil that boy always "bullied" me in the good term of "fun-bullying". I miss them a lot! And don't forget Tony from Jakarta. You are the only one Tony, you are irreplaceable.


In College. Wow college is so much fun! Eventhou i was mingle with all the boys at the first time. I finally spent a lot of my time with the girls too. My boys are amazing they always got my back. The girls are awesome too. I can say this is my first time i enjoy my time more with the girls than the boys. But i promised myself to always be there everytime the boys want me to be there.

The only thing i couldn't understand is the real "boyfriend". I know i don't have boyfriend yet, but my girls's boyfriends are so annoying!! I hate the moment when we all had so much fun and suddenly he made my friend cried because he was angry. I hate when he called my friend to go home when we were in the middle of fun time. I hate when he take control of my friend's life and decide what to do. I hate it!
Why in the world a girlfriend has to lost fun because of her boyfriend. Most of them are fun but sometimes they just kill my friend. Why because of the word "love" they can't say what they feel about their boyfriend. Because of they don't want to lose their boyfriend they have to lie or even hide everything inside and always be nice to make them happy?!

It's to "Rempong" the Jakarta's said. I don't wanna have a boyfriend who decide whatever is good for me to do, because i knew exactly what the best for me, it's different when i ask for an advice to him, so he free to tells me what to do.


I don't wanna lie to my boyfriend that i still need time to mingle with my friend and not pretend that i'm at home and tell my friends to shut up so  he might not know that i am lying.


I don't wanna have a boyfriend who always lie to me that i am the one.         
Most of my boy-friend always lie to his girlfriend that she is the one, he has another girlfriend instead. If you love me why do you have to cheat on me, right?


This is weird. I used to be a boy-friend hero. They always ask me to help  to talk with their girlfriend. I used to hate girls who hurt boys's heart, but it's normal for me if boys hurt girls.
But now i start to hate them all. They no longer can protect a girl, since one of my friend had s*x with a girl and make her pregnant. They no longer nice since they cheated on their girlfriend like my friend did.


I knew not all the boys are same. But mostly yes.
I think that's the reason why i rather stay single like this until i found a gentleman who can protect me, my heart and makes me feeling so special and not so annoying like another boyfriend does...