Sometimes
in my world, everything is just hard. I have no idea how could those happy
people live in this world without being sad. This time, just like some of old
times, I want to give up. Why can’t I stop crying? Why I’m trying so hard to
smile? Why?
I am ultra
sensitive person. Yesterday 2years old baby boy was angry to me and for me it
was hurt me so deep. What if an adult yelling to me?
I told you a
thousand times, I hate growing up. In my 20s, people keep pushing me, expect the
entire best thing for me, telling me that I’m an adult now. I HATE THEM ALL!
Why don’t you leave me alone with all immature thingy I have.
I want to die. It
makes me think that there will be noone taking care of me. People don’t have to
take me to the doctor, don’t have to talk bad thing behind my back, don’t have
to hurt because of my words, don’t have to mingle with a trouble maker like me.
I can’t satisfy
them. They keep telling me I have to do this and that if I don’t, I might hurt
them. Do I have power to understand those people? Do I have to do everything
they say to me? Do I have to be an adult? Do I have to….?
Age is just a
number. It doesn’t mean when you’re 40 you are way better than 17 years old
girl. But why people keep pushing me to be as good as they say? Do they ever
think of my feeling? They are just pretending to know everything about me.
I want to stop
dreaming, stop learning, stop talking, and stop thinking. So people will stop
pushing me.
I need therapist. Please
somebody help me…
