am I on the right track?

Hi Bloggers?? wat's up?

I can't sleep (Again!) . Everytime i try to sleep, i just keep rolling up and down with eyes closing. No matter how tired i am i still can't sleep. Seems like my whole body reject it.

I know there is something i can't rid out of my mind. This is about dream i've been dreaming about.

Seems like i've been torturing myself watching a bunch of successful singer on Youtube. They were just ordinary people like me at once, lived in a small town around a thousand of people holding their own dream.

am i doing something wrong here? is it wrong for believing this dream might be come true someday? I believe God has his own plan for me but am I in the right track??

I don't know

why i keep questioning myself a question i can't even answer it? why this is happen to me?

i'm not easy to give up but this, totally hard for me.

Why there's noone out there care about me, about my life, about what i love to do with my life, about my dream, about all my good ideas, about my charity program, about ME want TO MAKE A WORLD PEACE THROUGH MY MUSIC!! WHY!

why there's noone out there pay attention about what i gotta say on my twitter or my facebook or myspace even youtube video. WHY?

I'm tired of being all alone in this world while there's a lot of good thing i can do. Why nobody ever listen to me? Even my mom! I wish my father still alive, hug me and listen to every single word i say.

I love being different but i hate being ignore. Why i have all of this dreams spinning around in my head without knowing how to make it happen. I've been work so hard practicing, promoting, sending my demo or everything i can do ALL ALONE. Just because there are a lot of people done this and they got it.

I don't know what to say. This is my dream. What should i do then?

Why Justin Bieber, Yunalis Zarai, Alyssa Bernal, Savannah Outen got it all?

will i become one of them?

is this just a dream that i have to wake up and realize that this is won't happen in the real life?

Why there's noone helping me out to make me special?

I know, i'm not rich, i'm an orphan, i don't have someone i can lean on, i have nothing but believe in this world. I believe that someday i can be special, believe that this dream will come true, believe that i'm a waste of space.

am i on the right track?

is my voice good or not? am i deserve this or not? am i talented or not?

What can i do? i really want to give up bu i can't! it won't help anyway.

God ... i'm alone in this world. I've been working so hard, please at least give me something that can draw a smile on my face forever. I'm begging you.

It Feels Good

This year is one of the year that i hope i will wake up and make my dreams come true.

I still remember the way i had strong believe to fly and stay in the United States as an Exchange Student.

Eventho it wasn't easy as it seems. I have to compete with almost half of every student in Indonesia.

Eventho there was always someone who wanted to bring me down.

It wasn't easy at all! But i hold my faith. I believe Allah swt always here right beside me. Hear me begging for my dream in every single second of my breath.

Fortunately dream is really do come true. I flew to Washington, DC as an exchange student in 2008-2009.

I learned a lot of things that i couldn't find here in Indonesia.

This year i'm begging for another dream. I'm a kind of person who don't wanna live as an ordinary people. Because Allah swt gave us something extraordinary to work with it.

So many things i have to face no matter Sad, Happy, Tired, Dissapointed moment i have to go through

I will always put capital B-E-L-I-E-V-E on my heart every single time.

I don't care with those people who really want to let me down

I believe my dream again will come true and Allah swt will always here arranging what are the best thing i should have.

This time my dream is not that simple. Seems like impossible but let see what i can do with it!

I want to get my singing career go International like Yuna Zarai did. Yes! i'm still crazy about the way she got her dream come true.

It is not about me. It's all about i want to create peace through my music, because music is Universal language. When it comes to music everybody no matter who you are, where you are come from, what language do you speak, you will come together as one.

I also want to be like Selena Gomez who joined UNICEF to help kids all over the world, wanna be like Monique Coleman who named as first UN Youth Champion, wanna be like Lady Gaga who worked with MAC for Girls Protection.

So i have this idea to help School For Blind Children. We do raising donation by selling T-Shirt. For futher information check this link out : Give Donation fo School For Blind Children


I just want to do something in my youth age. I lived all alone here in Jakarta so i want to make sure that i can be something helpful for everyone around me.

I have this BIG passion in music as a singer and you couldn't even imagine. I always cry every single time i watch GLEE because i really do want to sing every single thing that happened in my life. Want to have someone i can share with who accept me for whoever i am. I want to sing on stage see everybody smiling at me and bring the happiness that they will never forget. I always cry every single time i watched Justin Bieber performance on TV or Youtube because i want to make my dreams come true.

So this whole month i've been work so hard to send my Demo to all International and Indonesian record label. I got a couple really good feedback. No i'm not get sign yet but i believe someday i will get that chance. But those people who gave me feedback was from International Label Record.

Someone from Arfa Records Team said : " It was a pleasure to hear your demos. Mashallah, you are endowed with a
melodious voice. Your passion to be a role model for young Muslim girls
also deserves appreciation. We pray to Almighty Allah that He may bless
you with great success in your pious pursuits, amen.


As we currently don't have any set-up in Indonesia and your traveling to
Pakistan isn't also feasible, so we regret that we won't be able to record
you in the studio and hence will be unable to release your album." 

But i'm not easy to give up. I keep send my Demo to all International Record Label all over the world.

A singer from Arfa Records sent me message he said : 

"Dear Sister Fitra Elnurianda,


Last night, in an Islamic music concert in Lahore, Pakistan, I met our manager A&R and he mentioned about your demos. The situation reminded me of that time when I was myself a new struggling artist and no record label was interested to sign me. You are a naturally talented artist and have the ability to become a successful Islamic singer"

And also someone from Lure Records said something to me : 

" Fitra

Dreams do come true, It is sad that every thing cost money in this world. I know you have something special. See what Budget you can come up with and we can go from there. Best of Luck to you. You are a Artist! "

Read all of those message make me keep holding this believe tighter and tighter. I believe Allah swt will find the way for me to make my dreams come true. It just a beginning. I will stand tall! I believe i born to be somebody ( Thanks to Justin Bieber for singing "Born To Be Somebody" and Lady Gaga for " Born This Way" song)

Today i got another email from someone from Lure Records. He wanted me to listen to their song called "It Feels Good". I definitely fall in love with this song. This song is Universal and Its talking about your dreams coming true and doing things that you never thought you could and it feels good!

Thank you so much for all those people in my life. They don't know who i am. They never see me before, but they gave me all of those support. It means A LOT to me!

Someday i will find my wings and give a try how far i gonna fly.

Someday i will be the first Indonesian who kick Grammy's stage and cry out loud my grateful feelings for whatever i've done to make my dreams come true.

I will always believe

I was born to be somebody

Someday my dream will do come true

I believe it with capital B-E-L-I-E-V-E